Cry For Help

O Lord, my God, I call for help by day
I cry out in the night before thee
Let my prayer come before thee
Incline thy ear to my cry!

For my soul is full of troubles
And my life draws near to Sheol
I am reckoned among those who go down to the pit;
I am a man who has no strength
Like one forsaken among the dead
Like the slain that lie in the grave
Like those whom thou dost remember no more
For they are cut off from thy hand

Thou hast put me in the depths of the Pit
In the regions dark and deep
Thy wrath lies heavy upon me
And thou dost overwhelm me with all thy waves

Thou hast caused my companion to shun me;
Thou has made me a thing of horror to them

I am shut in so that I cannot escape;
My eye grows dim through sorrow
Every day I call upon thee, O Lord
I spread out my hands to thee

Dost thou work wonders for the dead?
Do the shades rise up to praise thee?
Is the steadfast love declared in the grave
Or thy faithfulness in Abaddon?
Are thy wonders known in the darkness
Or thy saving help in the land of forgetfulness?

But I, O Lord, cry to thee;
In the morning my prayer comes before thee
O Lord, why dost thou cast me off?
Why dost thou hide thy face from me?
Afflicted and close to death from my youth up,
I suffer thy terrors;
I am helpless
Thy wrath has swept over me;
Thy dread assaults destroy me
They surround me like a flood all day long
They close in upon me together
Thou hast caused lover and friend to shun me
My companions are in darkness

Psalm 88



Thus says the LORD GOD:
Disaster after disaster!
Behold, it comes
An end has come
The end has come

It has awakened against you
Behold, it comes
Your doom has come to you
O inhabitant of the land

The time has come
The day is near
A day of tumult
And not of joyful shouting on the mountains

Now I will soon pour out my wrath upon you
And spend my anger against you
And judge you according to your ways
And I will punish you for all your abominations

And my eye will not spare
Nor will I have pity
I will punish you according to your ways
While your abominations are in your midst

Then you will know that I am the LORD, who smite.

Ezekiel 7:5-9

Give no ear to the Devil
You all make it too easy for him
By giving in to temptation…

Firstly and Lastly

I feel I have to explain it this way in order for people to understand what it is I am trying to say to them, as the ignorance is compelling. The Lord Jesus came to me, descended into the deepest darkest recesses of Hell to find me, and He pulled me out, many times, hence this journal. Understand and discern what this means, let the reader understand. I said nothing before He appeared, was nothing, am nothing and where I was, He still opened my heart, made it His own, and there it was laid bare, and torn open, destroyed completely, a mash of absolute rejection and every curse you could possibly imagine, weaved into flesh by the malice of my enemies, the devil and Satan and every demon set against me, mocked me. I did nothing to deserve it, I did nothing so I deserve it, I am nothing, I cannot be anything else but nothingness for that nothingness can only be filled by God and never anything evil in order to contain and embellish only Him, and at the same moment not be Him, but truly a mere reflection and a refraction of His Glory, made possible by the Sacrifice of the Lamb.

Try figuring out in a jiffy how every Word I have written and not written is bound to the fulfillment of the Gospels, all scriptures, The Revelation to John, and True Life in God. If your Heart was truly adorned with His Love, you would not need to figure it out. His Spirit is bound to me and this body, which will eventually die, but you must come first to the Knowledge within of what will happen when THIS body does die, even though I died a few times along the way. Darkness and death would cover the earth like a shroud if this body should be dead beyond a time, two times, and half a time. One would be inclined to say, nothing would happen, and that is true in a sense – the entire Universe will become an absolute nothingness as fast as how far the east is from west, infinity would even be no more, like it was before He spoke His Word. Thus, a home has been found and none are any wiser, but still mock and hate, mutter curses which have no power, just as it was before…

Know that I endured and still endure great suffering for you all, most of which you will not understand until all is said and done. Your Saviour Jesus and your Mother Mary, will gracefully endure the Crucifixion over and over and over and over to save you from your sins, but why do you still hang out after redemption around the precipice of Hell?

I will always be that nothing on Earth because of the abomination of your sins, but the Lord always gives back Mercy and Justice with repentance. Woe to you should His Justice be rendered unto you by His Most Holy Spirit, for none know from whence or how It comes, none can evade His Spirit; Truly, the Holy Spirit can even evade the Father or the Son, but would never evade both because the reunions and the departures are an Eternal Gift. It is a greater Gift therefore to be immersed in All Three. A Most Sacred Mystery which as you can see as you read, only serves to posit you in a place of disbelief and not wonder as it should, and I will always point thee to Christ to receive Him Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity, into Eternal Life. But no one acknowledges or asks me, and that does not bother me one bit at this point, but it truly grieves His Spirit. If it is not His Wonder you behold, you therefore will fear.

I found a place to reside
Deep inside
His Most Sacred Heart Divine
O Sublime and Pure Sweetness
I adored Thee to become Me

Have you not yet tasted? Do you not see?

A Heart made Sacred
A Sacred Heart on Fire
Immaculate Her Heart is
Sacred and on Fire
Love lets Hearts unite

Let Him make your heart His own

Judgement Day
Starts today
And will take Us a thousand years
This is my last warning
The only books you should be reading now
Are the ones that led me to Heaven while on Earth I was here
The Bible and True Life in God

If I go before you in Love
Will you follow me with that same Love?

So the step forward begins with unity and peace…


Patience out of Love is always worth enduring
Suffering out of Love is always worth enduring
Helping others out of Love is always worth enduring
_______ out of Love is always worth enduring
Fill in the blanks
Does not work if the blanks are filled with things wrapped in hate

To Know

I came to know the Lord
My God
In His Way
Which is to say

Wonder (Fear of the Lord)

I remember them all, try to live them all, however the order is how His Spirit is arrayed within me today, wrapped in Love.
Good luck figuring out why I am struggling to stay pious!


The sting of death is sin
And the power of sin is the law
For just as sin came into the world
Through one man
And death came through sin
And so death spread to all because all have sinned
Sin was indeed in the world before the law
But sin is not reckoned when there is no law
And the law is written on your hearts

Behold, the world you inherited
Sin thrives because of your laws
I came to abolish all laws
Keep in mind
The first three about love
For all the Law is fulfilled
By love alone


I read a chapter of Luke today
I read it out loud
And all of Heaven could hear
And my Heart projected
Telling it like a story
And as I was doing so
The memories came flooding in
I could not stop reading
And I could not stop seeing
A Journey
Parallel to my own as I read

Twenty four minutes it took to read
And that was the chapter
But took as long as four days

There is still but one more thing